Feels like a heart break

i never got the chance to share my feelings with you
may be i did get many chances but i was scared
i used so many excuses to convince myself i’d be fine
that i needed to clear “doubts”
but the moment we made a decision to be just friends,
i realised that was a silly thing to say

i have cried almost everyday after that decision
things don’t seem to be ok with me
I have obviously overlooked everything i said was the issue
to be honest, it wasn’t an issue at all
the only thing that  may be
is the miles between us

Although i said the problems aloud to myself,
or thought of it as deeply as i could,
i wasn’t being true to myself
you are the one i talk to that makes me shot out all other distractions
even if at times i tend to pay a little attention to them

A large percentage of this heart is yours
but till i can find the right words,
i’d soak my pillows wet
at least i deserve it
but something in me says we are meant to be

it feels like a heart break
yet it is not official
it feels like a heart break
because things are not as they were
it feels like a heart break because i overthink
and a part of me tells me that that was a good bye
it may be false but,
what if it’s true?

Then it is definitely a heart break
baby girl , you broke your own heart!

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