Tag Archive | age

Clothed Compliments

I don’t mean to be picky
or read into your statements so much
but I want you to be plain
no hidden meaning

When you say ,”I look good for my age”
Where lies the emphasis,
on my age or how good I look
I strongly want to believe that it’s on how good I look
but I can’t overlook ” for my age”

Is my age old or young
You seem to know the forecast of looks for people my age
please educate me
soothe my curiosity

You say, “you don’t sound “black ”
Why don’t you say I sound good or bad
However you think “blacks” sound
that sentence makes it feel like “blacks” ,
excuse you, brown people sound a certain way
Which may be good or bad

Oh you aren’t full British
Your english sounds so good for you not to be British
Thank you that’s  a lovely compliment
but I’m trying so hard to see pass the comparative noun

You are pretty for a coloured girl
Are you mixed ?
Surely your dad or mum might be “white”
now that whole sentence is wrong

I can only hope you see the problem
no, i won’t just take the compliment as it is
Don’t compliment me while being bigotry to a group of people
or making a group seem like a standard for another

Please strip the compliments
Let it stand separated from all hidden insults
Give me naked compliments not clothed and suited compliments
If that is so hard, give me nothing at all
I promise no hard feelings


22+ Stages

Life is an open book but even more so a stage
We are the actors with no scripts
We create it as we go along
No, it was created for us before we came along
The interesting part, you don’t act alone
It’s no solo performance

However you don’t get to meet all other actors at once
They pop up as you go along
The first actress you meet is your mum
then the nurses and doctors
Finally, the rest of the family
but you aren’t aware of your environment

Each scene you play at first is unplanned
but as you play along you get use to the actors
If they debut more than once that is

Are you ready to go through each stage?
To watch each scene of this particular life
Scenes bursting with emotions, suspense, struggle,
transformation, hope, mercy, grace, evil of the heart etc

“Ladies and gentlemen”, said the stage director
This is the first stage – Umbilical chord wrapped around her neck
See her coming out the wrong side out, bottoms up!!
She’s God’s vessel of mercy
Yes, all is well
It’s a girl! the doctor exclaimed at 10.45 am

Stage 2 – She’s learning how to seat and crawl . Suckling and trying to get attention by crying and screaming

Stage 3 to 7 – Nursery school into primary school. The girl sings and likes dancing . Competitive and likes to be appreciated for hard work especially by her parents . She notices boys and starts developing her crushes. Cute isn’t it , but not for long .

Stage 8 to 10- She realises the talents placed in her. She leads the dance team , acts in school plays and takes the lead in songs ( by the rivers of babylon). A particular play she acted as a french maiden. She also plays the violin , writes and leads the dance group both african dance and contemporary . Athletic feet, this scene is one you should take note of. How she tries to be in every area of the event to help her house win- running, high jump, marathon, relay race etc . We’d take a further look at the marathon; see how she almost faints but once her coach cries out, do it for your parents she appears to keep going and finally at the finish line collapses in the arms of her dad. See how she cries to her mum when a boy says he likes her , so pure and naive. Party planner and organiser. Her Party planning encounter at this stage, at primary school but this didn’t seat well with the authorities but the food had to be shared . Encounter with her cousin while acting , evidence that evil abides in all stages of life in the heart of man.

Stage 11 to 12- These are the pre- turbulent stage as you can see it is set up with many hurdles as she needs to go through this to become a teen. She gets competitive and starts becoming outspoken . Standing up for her right even if it is rudely done but see she is fragile with her heart knitted deep to her family. Hear how she cries when dropped off at school. When scolded or doesn’t get her way, she how she carries herself angrily and serving face . Hits her head on the bed or wall to show she’s angry. “That’s gonna hurt” , someone exclaimed from the audience. “Yes but no because wound self afflicted doesn’t usually hurt since one is mentally prepared for it” , said another . This stage she started high school. She took part in a beauty pageant and came third overall but fell ill right after as you can see. “A good means to use to get an exit back home”,  a lady said. She is the queen of home sickness as you see how she sneaks to get the house mistresses’ phone to give her dad a call. Throwing her dad into panic mode as he thinks something has gone wrong with his daughter and his wife. At this stage , she took part in a dance competition for only freshers, infront of the whole school audience and came out third.

Stage 13 to 15 -The turbulent stage as a teenager
Her body starts changing in full force. See how more guys start strutting by for her attention without a care in the world of how grown she has suddenly become. At this stage her mean girl attitude towards guys had fully developed and how she paid no mind to them. She embarrasses them with every fibre of her being. Rude isn’t she ?! . Few scenes later,” she looks worried as you may notice “, said the stage director . The reason , well at this stage all her friends had recieved their visitor . The trophy of womanwhood and her shelf was still empty . She hadn’t visited and she was one of the last people for it to hit. Into prayer of agreement they went . * The audience laughs* so young and eager at this time but at other stages you see mixed reactions to this precious visitor she waited and prayed for. Seeking to grow into a woman but still crying to go home from high school. Party planner for most class parties , see how she calls for help in areas and organises the refreshments for the party.

Stage 16 – Slim and feeling herself . Started developing properly in the right places. Almost done with high school counting the number of senior boys that liked her , classmates and her class guys. “Achievement isn’t it” , the director said sarcastically
Party planner extraordinaire but too busy to enjoy the party.

Stage 17 – She’s done with high school . Feeling free and young.
She has Joined facebook and exposed herself to virtual friendship.
More suitors starting lurking both genuine and fake.
She throws a birthday party with the rest of my classmates at her father’s house.
Preparing to go off to foundation programme where she’d be thousands of miles and feets away from home.
“How was she going to survive” , she thinks and ponders.
Her thoughts racing and mind already missing home but she has to go.

Stage 18 – 1st year of university . When all things aren’t clear . When going out with friends at night felt cool and crazy fun . Where you tried all to get the attention of a guy in final year and got really irritated by their attitude .when making money by herself struck her again through a different means. Not by making beads or selling cards or jewellery like she did in the 11th – 16th stage but by a different means . The art of hair styling and so it started.

Stage 19 – At this stage she fights harder with her spiritual standing . Christ her goal. Singing in the choir , writing and working hard at university . She started a web page to put up write ups but did not put her name to it for reasons she’d reveal . This stage you see the burst of different roles and actors. Where other actors came into her life playing the part of suitors and some players . Where girls smiled at, and with her but spoke of her behind her back. She is getting the attention of their “man” (” Really?!” the stage director exclaimed). Where she started doing volunteer jobs and paid jobs at the side of her personal business . Exploring her hands and mind in every area where possible. Teaching , counter assistant etc

Stage 20- The year before “adulthood” (dramatic pause). See her innocence starts fading where words were over thought and given sexual meanings. This learned from the first guy that she really liked at stage 17. Who wanted to be around her for her positivity but ended up draining her because he was filled with mood swings. Where she acted naively with guys but thankfully not throwing her pearl to the mud but this didn’t stop her from seating with it there. Just like any other new adventure , she replayed this scene but in different ways . This is the stage when those interested in her became in numbers too much to count . How they blew luring breeze to her face. They played their part perfectly . Finding it hard to turn down any due to how soft hearted she became in contrast to stage 16 where saying no was a piece of cake .Most importantly this was the stage where she started being exposed to the reformation through a dear friend .

Stage 21 – A tough year. Where she lost her friend . It changed her forever, sort of . Broke her in places she never knew existed . Where she was looked at as someone that stole hearts and broke hearts . Where she knew she could walk herself into those hearts that thought they were all that but knew she had greater power to walk out slowly without looking back although she did look back a few times. This is the stage she was introduced with the reformation in full force and it embraced her without mercy. She stood up to people and shared her belief . Almost lost friendships due to her boldness and offensive truths .See how she is being looked at differently by those around. She studied the bible hard and spent time on her knees . Seeking for knowledge and sharing as much as she could with all that would and would not listen

Stage 22- Decision making. She wished to be at two stages before . Where her mum and dad told her what to do and the road to take but that was 730 days ago. This time any decision she made they let her be. Letting her walk with it. They just gave advice but the ball was in her court . This stage where she has so many asides – thinking out loud and self dialogues. Where she had to pretend to be someone else giving advice to herself . Where she was in an actual dialogue with those around her which didn’t help matters as they gave their advice based on their experience. I mean where else do people give their pool of wisdom from that they always want to share .

Stage 22+ – She just started to explore this stage . As you can see she is somewhat clueless and trying to adjust. She never felt the 22nd stage but  it happened. When the need to make ones mind up is getting more frightening . Saying no or saying yes to choices that could change her life for the better or the worse . Where pleasing her parents is important to her and may likely influence some decisions she makes. Where pleasing God with everything she is is paramount.She is just few days into this stage.She fights the good fight but it is more difficult to stay on track .  Unlike stages pass , her knees ocassionaly grace the floors where she usually frequented .The stage she was lured by the passion in her heart but God in His mercy did not let her be destroyed completely. This stage she feels she may have found the one or the one has found her but she is still pondering and watching. The 22+ stage seems like war !! but hopefully she would be a soldier on guard and a soldier on her knees.

These are the stages of this lady’s life in short scenes
A summary of how she became and how she is becoming
Life is an open book but even more so a stage
For this life, these are her 22+ stages

age is nothing but a NUMBER

I have been trying to grasp that i would be a year older in a weeks time

few weeks ago i had a dream that i could still be lifted by my dad

like he used to do when i was little.

what i would give to go back to the days.

but you know what they say ,backward never forward ever

but i would not mind stepping back a little

before facing the reality that i am growing up

i still have the need to cuddle my stuffed puppy that was given to me as a gift,

i still have that inner child in me that still wants to play on a bouncy castle,

run around in play grounds and just leave each day as it comes,

play tag, and hide and seek.

But as  days go by i feel just the same just another digit has been added to me

i am still that child from before ,only wiser and of course way way taller.

some days i lay in bed and  cry with need to be around my family

them being thousands of miles away;

with these feelings still intact,

i have joined the large few to conclude, that age is nothing but a NUMBER.

well,in this case it is.